Diffidence vs. Self Confidence

K S VENKATARAMAN

During that evening, Mani Sharma, a very famous singer was to sing in a music hall. There was a very huge crowd of his fans. The house was full. Quite a number of connoisseurs of music had gathered in the hall and had taken seats in vantage rows. Everybody was eagerly waiting for the arrival of the singer. There was some delay. Then Manian, the Secretary of the Sabha (music hall) came to stage and announced that due to some unavoidable reasons, the singer could not arrive as programmed.

The disappointment of the fans was obvious. The clamor filled the air. The Secretary continued. He said, “I understand your disappointment. I am sorry for what has happened. We have arranged another concert by this young man, Balan as a stopgap arrangement. I request you to understand and remain for the concert.”

The people understood the position but they could not accept the new singer in the place of the famous singer they were expecting to hear. The Secretary of the Sabha also announced the new program apologetically. He did not say a nice word about Balan. The tinge of regret in his voice was not helpful to the new singer. His request to the audience to stay back made it appear as though staying back was a sort of punishment for them.

The circumstances were not ideal for Balan to begin a new career. He had a very good practice but this was his first appearance on stage. He had to sing instead of a great singer, who had made name and fame in the field. The audience was unfriendly, if not inimical. The sort of introduction he got was, to say the least, not encouraging to him.

These circumstances would have completely drained any diffident person of his energy. He would have imagined that the whole audience was bent on humiliating him. Much anger would have welled up in his mind against the Secretary, for not having introduced him properly. He would have found it impossible to perform even at his average level, leave alone performing at his best. He would have left after registering an indelible, bad impression in the minds of the audience. He would not have seen it as an opportunity to prove himself but as a doom-laded pitfall. In short, he would have confirmed the disappointment of the fans and spoiled his career in music.

But, Balan was made of a different stuff. He was a self-confident person. He conducted himself with majesty. He was viewing it all as a fortunate opportunity. He was determined to make the most of it. He was already visualizing a very good admiring audience. He was eager to hear their applauses soon.

He noticed that the Secretary was not very enthusiastic about introducing him well. That only intensified his inner determination to succeed. He was not depending on courage from any external source. He told himself that his success was not dependent on the few words of praise from the Secretary. He dismissed the action of the Secretary with a sense of pity that he (the Secretary) did not know how to do his job. He was not placing himself at a position subordinate to that of Secretary. He judged him for a moment, found his introduction irrelevant and threw him out of his mind, without the least hatred. He only retained his gratitude towards the Secretary for having provided such an opportunity.

Actually, he was appreciative of the fact that it was a rare opportunity for him to substitute such a famous singer, to perform in the presence of a learned audience in such a big Sabha. He believed that it augured very well for his progress. He made a mental commitment to perform exceedingly well.

When he appeared at the stage, it was not absolute silence that greeted him. People were murmuring among themselves. It was a mixture of complaint, dissatisfaction, impatience and indifference. In the absence of a proper introduction, most of them believed that the newcomer was going to spoil the evening. The singer was shrewd enough to judge the attitude of the audience accurately.

He addressed the audience in a confident voice.

“Ladies and gentlemen, good evening to all of you. I am exhilarated to be here in front of such a learned audience. Where else I can sing before a great group of connoisseurs like here!

First of all, I convey my heartfelt thanks to Mr. Manian, the Secretary for having blessed me with such a great opportunity of singing before you.

I regard Mani Sharma, as my role model. I consider this a result of my poorva punya that I have had this great opportunity to substitute such a reputed singer, whom millions of knowledgeable persons like you admire all over the world. I dedicate my performance to Mr. Mani Sharma, as a mark of my ineffable respect for him.

Thank You.”

The audience applauded in appreciation of this speech, even before they heard him sing.*

The newcomer began to sing. Knowing the full value of the opportunity, he gave his best to the performance. He excelled himself. He got the applauses from the audience umpteen times. He went up several steps in the ladder of estimation of the audience and the Secretary of the Sabha as well.

This is how self-confidence enables one to achieve success, even when failure seems to be certain. Without self-confidence, one will be unable to present himself properly or acquit himself creditably.

*Notes

First of all by praising the audience, as ‘learned” and ‘connoisseurs’ he made friends with them. He thanked the Secretary openly and his mind became free of any misgivings about him. He revealed his own respect for Mr. Mani Sharma, whom the entire audience respected; and thus became one among them. By establishing his common ground with them like this, he converted an unfriendly audience into a friendly one. Such a brief and confident speech endeared him to the audience and he was no longer ‘new’ for them.

K S Venkataraman associateeditor@dynamicyouth.org www.dynamicyouth.org

Human Relations Development (HRD)
K S VENKATARAMAN

Umashanker -:

Hi Mr. Venkataraman Really nice to see a website fully dedicated to youth and specially with Indian origin. Because on internet, we do have many youth oriented websites but their material & target audience is totoally something else.

Keep the good work going sir !!!

Regards

Dear friends,

I reproduce below an extract from the Editor's page of Dynamic Youth, January 2008 relevant to the assassination of Ms. Benazir Bhutto. A detailed account of this tragic event, to be perceived by humankind as a failure of human relations, has been published in this issue of Dynamic Youth (January 08)

One more thing just now I had to regretfully add. In the long list of gruesome murders of human history, an addition has been made. I refer to the gory assassination of Ms. Benazir Bhutto on 27th December. There is no reason or objective under the Sun that could justify such an atrocity. My dear youth, such bad incidents occur because of loss of values and goodwill among the people. This is a subject worthy of cogitation by all of you. We should put an end to acts of terrorism and extremism by spreading human values.

The Pan-Commonwealth Youth Caucus Statement on Benazir Bhutto's Assassination is a proof of the fact that today's youth take serious notice of such blunders committed in the names of politics and religion; it is a solid evidence that such gruesome activities are definitely not to their liking; it is a notice served on their seniors to stop behaving irresponsibly, endangering humanity; and, above all, it is a reassurance that politics and religion of the future would not be founded on hatred.

This statement reflects the voice of the global youth against teh beastly crime committed against a leader that goes against all the human values. Let us communicate this statement, straightforward expression of the stand of the modern youth, to all the peoples of the world; and hope that it would stir in the minds of all a moral awakening.

With kind regards,

K S VenkataramanElaine Howard wrote:

Pan-Commonwealth Youth Caucus Statement on Benazir Bhutto's Assassination

3 January 2008

As young Commonwealth leaders and active members of society between the ages of 18 and 29, we are greatly saddened by the assassination of Former Prime Minister Benazir Bhutto in Pakistan on 27 December 2007.

While we do not take sides in the political arena in any country, this event may be seen as an indication that the world in general is slipping further away from peace.

As young people who are aware that such an event is likely to have global ramifications, we encourage our peers in Pakistan, the Commonwealth and across the world to take this opportunity to promote peace strongly in their own communities to show that civil paths to peace still exist in times of turmoil. To move forward, young leaders of the Commonwealth encourage our national leaders to engage youth in positive ways, not only during the aftermath of Bhutto's death, but in the longer term so as to prevent events like this from occurring again. We encourage national, regional and community leaders to set the foundations for peace in their own communities by offering distinctly non-violent channels of youth engagement in society, such as employment opportunities, interfaith and inter-ethnic initiatives, community service programs, classes on world civilizations and conflict resolution, and opportunities for reconciliation.

We ask this not only for ourselves but also for the future of the Commonwealth and by extension our global society, which must learn from this tragedy.

Mobafa Baker
Pan-Commonwealth Youth Caucus
Elaine Howard - elaine.howard@gmail.com